RBF

Photo by Yulia Polyakova, Pexels

Just what is RBF?

I’ve been feeling a tad on the cranky side lately and just learned something new from my husband—RBF or ‘resting bitch face.’

Well, I had to look that one up. The Cambridge Dictionary says and that RBF is “a slang term for a neutral or relaxed facial expression that unintentionally appears angry, annoyed, contemptuous, or serious.”

Honestly, I am not sure that fits because I suspect the RBF in me is more intentional grumpy looking! The inside me reflected on the outside.

Scowling at life I am

From the war, to the weather, to the slow ‘I don’t know where I am going’ Tulip Time visitor traffic here in Holland, Michigan, to the price of gas—it’s not hard to find something that makes me crabby or brings me down. The RBF on me isn’t relaxed and resting at all. She’s more like frustrated and even feeling a tad bit hopeless.

Is the glass half full or half empty?

It’s easy in this RBF state for me to see a lot of half empty glasses. I don’t have to look too far to see something that I really do not like at all.

All that negativity inside is really rather sticky. It likes to collect things and grabs on for a strong hold. As it builds it becomes too easy to ignore all the half full glasses sitting within my eye sights’ reach.

To be an RBF or not to be…

That is a good question to ponder. I do have a choice. Even in the midst of my RBF showing I still do have a choice.

Being aware or mindful is the key to unlocking that scowling mind and face of mine. Once I notice what I am doing inside and outside I can opt to continue or perhaps search for a glass half full!

For example: my gas tank is ¾ full, the lovely flowering trees in town that are full of beautiful pink and white blooms, the air that smells so sweet this time of year when it rains.

Also: the flickering leaves dancing in the wind, the peace I feel walking in my neighborhood, the darling cat of mine all curled up sleeping so sweetly in the sunshine—all of which bring a smile to my face and inside my heart too.

It’s hard to be RBF when I take notice of these sorts of things right here in front of me. They are just sitting here waiting to be experienced.

Shifting from an RBF to an RPF

‘RPF’ is my newly invented term and goal—’resting peaceful face’. It’s a much calmer place to be inside and out. I know this shift will have to happen more than once or twice. More like a zillion times. It just will.

Each time I find my RPF once again is a victory to be celebrated. The negative energy is not pulling me down! Rather the positive energy is lifting me up enabling me to better cope with the challenges in the world around me.

If with today’s challenges are you are all too often showing your RBF perhaps it’s time to reach for Anxiety Therapy or Depression Therapy. So, you can find your RPF! Do contact me today…I get it. Right now, is a really hard time!

JD’s Midlife Tools For Living Practices, Holland, MI
Offering Heartfelt care, Compassion and Coping Tools